Walking down the cookie aisle can feel like a nightmare when you’re trying to find something worth eating. There are so many options staring back at you, all promising to taste amazing, but most of them just disappoint. Some cookies taste like cardboard, others fall apart before you even get them out of the package, and a few actually taste worse than the box they came in. After testing dozens of store-bought cookies from different brands, the truth came out about which ones you should avoid completely and which ones might actually be worth your money.
Breaktime cookies taste like airplane food
When a cookie package tells you the cookies are “great for dunking,” that’s basically the company admitting they made something dry and hard. Breaktime cookies from Dare are exactly that kind of product. The packaging looks old-school and reminds you of cookies from childhood, but that’s where any good feelings end. These cookies are so hard that your jaw gets tired trying to chew them, and finding chocolate chips feels like searching for buried treasure.
The few chocolate chips that do appear taste bland and don’t add anything to the cookie. Everything about these chocolate chip cookies screams “we didn’t try very hard.” They’re the kind of cookies you’d get on a plane and only eat because you’re stuck there with limited options. For a brand that’s been around forever, Dare really dropped the ball with Breaktime. Save your money and skip these completely unless you enjoy chewing on something that has the texture of a hockey puck.
Keebler’s Chips Deluxe look and taste burnt
Something went seriously wrong in the Keebler factory when they made Chips Deluxe cookies. These cookies are flat and weirdly shaped, almost like someone accidentally sat on them before they went into the oven. The color is darker than it should be, and when you smell them, there’s a distinct burnt odor that makes you wonder if anyone at Keebler actually tasted these before shipping them out. It’s disappointing because Keebler has made some decent cookies in the past.
Taking a bite confirms what your nose already told you. The burnt taste is overwhelming and covers up any other possible thing you might taste. Both the chocolate and the cookie dough taste like they got left in the oven too long. There’s no sweetness, no butter taste, nothing good at all. The burnt flavor is so strong that it’s all you can think about while eating them. Even if you’re desperate for cookies, these aren’t worth eating. Those Keebler elves need to go back to cookie-making school.
Great Value cookies crumble into a mess
Walmart’s Great Value brand tries to compete with name brands by offering cheaper prices, but their chocolate chip cookies prove that sometimes you really do get what you pay for. These cookies are packed full and look decent enough when you first open the package. They’re golden brown with plenty of mini chocolate chips scattered throughout, which makes them seem promising. But the second you pick one up and take a bite, everything falls apart.
The cookies are so crumbly that you’ll need to stand over a trash can or plate to eat them without making a huge mess. Crumbs go everywhere, coating your hands, your shirt, and whatever surface you’re near. The taste isn’t much better than the texture. Instead of tasting like butter, they have this weird rancid oil flavor that sticks to your tongue. The chocolate chips don’t really taste like chocolate either, even though there are plenty of them. These store-bought cookies are more expensive than Chips Ahoy, which makes the whole experience even more frustrating.
Grandma’s cookies taste like eating Crisco
Those two-packs of Grandma’s cookies sitting in the checkout line at grocery stores are there for impulse buys, not because they’re any good. These cookies are way too soft in an unnatural way that tells you they’re loaded with preservatives to keep them from going bad. When you bite into one, the texture is mushy and weird, nothing like a fresh-baked cookie should feel. The whole experience is off-putting from the start.
The worst part about Grandma’s cookies is the greasy, oily coating they leave in your mouth. It tastes like you just ate a spoonful of shortening straight from the can. That flavor stays with you long after you finish eating, coating your tongue and making you wish you’d chosen something else. The cookies barely have any chocolate chips, and if someone blindfolded you, you’d probably guess these were sugar cookies instead. There’s nothing grandmotherly or homemade about these cookies at all. Real grandmas would be offended that their name is attached to something this bad.
Benton’s chocolate chip cookies from Aldi fall apart
Aldi is usually a great place to find cheap versions of name-brand products that taste almost as good as the real thing. Their Benton’s chocolate chip cookies are not one of those success stories. These cookies look normal enough when you first open the package, but picking one up reveals major problems. They’re incredibly crumbly and start breaking apart before you even get them to your mouth. By the time you finish eating one cookie, you’ve created a pile of crumbs on yourself and everything around you.
The chocolate chips are few and far between, and the ones that are there don’t taste like much. The cookie itself is bland and forgettable, with no butter taste or anything else to make it interesting. It’s not sweet enough, not chocolatey enough, and definitely not worth the mess. Making chocolate chip cookies shouldn’t be this hard, but somehow Aldi’s version manages to mess up one of the simplest cookies out there. You can find much better options for the same price or even cheaper at other stores.
New Moon Kitchen claims to be the best but isn’t
When a cookie package says it’s the “Best in the Whole Wide World,” you expect something pretty amazing. New Moon Kitchen’s vegan cookies cost almost seven dollars, which is a lot to spend on cookies that better be incredible. These cookies are organic, made with spelt flour, and come from Toronto. They sound fancy and healthy, which makes you think they might actually live up to the hype printed on their package.
Unfortunately, these cookies taste stale right out of the package. They don’t have the crispy texture you want from a good cookie. Instead, they’re sort of soft but not in a good chewy way. The oats mixed in are a nice touch and add some texture, but they can’t save these cookies from being disappointing. If you’re specifically looking for spelt flour cookies, these might work for you, but most people will find them underwhelming. Spending seven dollars on cookies that taste like they’ve been sitting around too long is frustrating, especially when the package promises the world.
Mulino Bianco Cuoricini miss the mark completely
Italian cookies sound fancy and exotic, like they should taste better than regular American cookies. Mulino Bianco Cuoricini are little heart-shaped cookies sold at specialty stores like Eataly. They cost more than most other cookies because they’re imported and Italian. The heart shape is cute, but that’s about all they have going for them. Opening the package reveals broken cookies, which seems like a bad sign from the start.
The chocolate chips blend into the cookie too much and don’t stand out at all. Everything tastes mushed together without any distinct chocolate or cookie flavor. It’s all just sort of bland and sameness. Italians are known for amazing food, but chocolate chip cookies apparently aren’t their strong suit. They’re much better at making espresso and biscotti than trying to compete with American-style chocolate chip cookies. These heart-shaped cookies won’t win your heart or your taste buds. Save your money for actual Italian specialties instead of trying to force Italian bakers to make American-style treats.
Homestyle cookies actually taste like cardboard
Some cookies are bland and boring, but Homestyle cookies take it to another level by literally tasting like cardboard. These cookies look like they were made by a machine that counted out exactly how many chocolate chips to add to each cookie, probably no more than ten per cookie. Everything about them screams generic and low-effort. They’re the definition of a cookie that exists just to exist, not because anyone actually wanted to make something good.
Biting into one confirms what you already suspected from looking at them. There’s no real taste at all, just a vague sweetness and that unmistakable cardboard flavor. The texture is slightly better than some other bad cookies because they don’t completely fall apart, but that’s the only positive thing to say. These cookies taste like the box they came in would probably taste. Nothing about them is enjoyable or worth eating. If someone gave you these cookies for free, you’d still feel like you overpaid.
Benton’s iced oatmeal cookies look and taste terrible
Oatmeal cookies can be delicious when done right, but Benton’s iced oatmeal cookies from Aldi are definitely not done right. The white icing on top is spotty and uneven, making them look like someone dropped them and then tried to fix the damage. They’re not attractive cookies, and eating them is even worse than looking at them. The icing doesn’t help anything and just adds more sweetness to an already problematic cookie.
These cookies have the strangest texture where they’re somehow both hard and soft at the same time. Your teeth hurt biting into them because they’re so tough, but then they feel stale and old once you start chewing. The oatmeal creates an annoying grainy feeling that rubs against your molars. Brown sugar comes through a little bit, but it’s not enough to save them. Eating these cookies feels like a chore instead of a treat. Why anyone would buy a whole family-sized package of these is a complete mystery.
Finding good store-bought cookies shouldn’t be this hard, but the truth is that most of them just aren’t worth your time or money. Whether they’re too dry, too crumbly, too bland, or just plain gross, these worst cookies all share one thing in common: they’re all disappointing. Next time you’re in the cookie aisle, remember which brands to avoid so you don’t waste money on something that tastes like cardboard or leaves your mouth coated in weird oil. Stick with the brands that actually put effort into making decent cookies, and your snack time will be much better.
